Flapper 

Back view of Madrid Soccer team (Outfits bought in Hong Kong) 

Madrid Soccer team at NZ Rugby 7s 

art deco flappers

Last week I went to Napier
to see the annual crowd
who flock to dress as flappers and
adorn the streets. No dowds
would dare to speak against them,
so many in the swing.
I really want to join the throng-
next year I'll do my thing.
I talked it out with girlfriends,
next year will be a week
of Deco madness, flapper fun
so now we'll have to seek
out costume bits and pieces -
the gloves, the head gear, shoes...
The men just wear a white shirt
and braces, who'd refuse?

We also go to rugby
sevens; we can wear
our glamour outfits there as well
and look great, never fear...
the people in the cake tin stands
are dressed in any gear,
so long as we look festive
or crazy, none will stare.
We all wore soccer outfits,
(Madrid's team, white and sharp)
My own had 'Beckham' on the back
and so I made my mark.


GREAT MINDS DISCUSS IDEAS
AVERAGE MINDS DISCUSS EVENTS
SMALL MINDS DISCUSS PEOPLE

electric fly swat 

electric fly swat

Staff meeting was the cream on top
of 'What a day'... I want to chop
the head off every man I meet. But now
I'm laughing and I must allow
I've lost the urge to snap. The lot
are idiots! Mine bought an electronic fly swat! What?
A raquet-shaped fly swatter that
is strung with wires. They go splat
and fry each fly you swing at. Men!
They watch the fly then spark and burn
but will they ever even learn
a swatter only needs to kill?
This version has an extra thrill.

GREAT MINDS DISCUSS IDEAS
AVERAGE MINDS DISCUSS EVENTS
SMALL MINDS DISCUSS PEOPLE

The Mission Estate Winery, Napier, Hawkes Bay, New Zealand

The venue for the Mission Concert where Rod Stewart is playing tonight.

Rod Stewart

That aging rocker, Rachel's ex
has Lear-ed into the Bay.
He's here to sing in Taradale,
the Mission concert way:
Each year we have an artist who
adorns the outdoor stage
and people picnic in the sun
then sing along and rage
until the darkness has decended...
thousands go each year
but I could not get tickets
so I'm sitting, writing, here.


GREAT MINDS DISCUSS IDEAS
AVERAGE MINDS DISCUSS EVENTS
SMALL MINDS DISCUSS PEOPLE

back to work

Been back at work a little while and things are settling down,
today I got a whole lot done, there's no way I could frown.
The other day my daughter moved back here, near us, in town.

I wrote a piece of doggerel about a joke sent here,
a joke about 2 blondes... you know, the sort of joke so rare.


She was into lick-proof lip-gloss
and false-eyelash curling tongs,
she wore D-cup stretch bikinis
and the bottoms were all thongs;
she could look as though she listened
while her eyes stayed blank and fond,
she was every man's pet fantasy
-you guessed it - she was blonde.

She was driving home from shopping
and admiring her nails,
half deciding to re-paint them
so her pace was not a snail's,
when a siren interrupted
any nail polish plan
and she slowed, anticipating
a cute uniform-clad man.

But the cop was five-foot-seven
if you didn't count her hat
and beneath the fetching head-gear
was blonde hair. Imagine that!
Well, she checked her Rookies' manual
then, "Your licence, please," she stated
and she checked her butt's reflection
in the window while she waited.

So the blonde who had been speeding
turned away to get her purse
but she fumbled 'round for ages
making things look even worse.
Then she patted her blonde tresses
and she made a counter-strike
as she asked in helpless baby-tones
"Um...what's a licence like?"

Well! Referring to her manual,
the blonde cop looked for clues
and the illustrations helped her
so she grinned into her shoes.
"It's a square shape with your picture on,"
she tried to patronise
but the other blonde was wise to her
and rolled her batting eyes.

So she delved into the makeup kit
she kept inside her car,
she was smiling in the mirror
as she said, "Ah! Here you are."
Next, the mirror was reflecting
prim brass buttons on a top,
so the officer said "Sorry!
-Didn't realise you're a cop!"


GREAT MINDS DISCUSS IDEAS
AVERAGE MINDS DISCUSS EVENTS
SMALL MINDS DISCUSS PEOPLE